What do you do when you feel like giving up…

In episode 7 of the Inside Out Entrepreneur® Podcast I talk about what you can do when you are feeling really stuck or feeling like you can't move forward. Sometimes that can feel like you can't do it any more or sometimes it can show up as just going around and around in circles getting busy but not moving forward.

I talk about my concept of 're-ignition' and how you can harness this in difficult times in your life or business.

I also explain how your mind can trick you into thinking you can't do anything about this feeling and how you can move beyond that so you quickly leave that place.

Tune in to find out more and don’t forget to hit the subscribe button so you get notified of future shows.

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Episode Summary

How you can quickly shift your mindset to overcome obstacles that are making you feel stuck.
How you can reconnect with your inner world and inner strength by understanding the concept of 're-ignition'
Why some of your thoughts about the future should be challenges and the one word / concept that tends to cause you to get stuck.
How I discovered this during a very challenging health crisis and how this method works whether you are dealing with health issues, mental issues or any other blocks in your life and in your business. It is universally applicable.

If you find that you ride the emotional rollercoaster a little more than you'd like to, this episode is definitely for you. It will help you if:

You are feeling stuck, wobbling or thinking "I can't do this".
You are blocked by fears about how something might turn out in your business.
You stop yourself moving forward and even when you know you are doing this you still get stuck in a rut.
You sometimes feel that one part of you wants (so much) to succeed but the other part is teetering on the edge of a cliff called "the valley to defeatedness".

Listen in and save this episode for all those times when you get stuck.

Links mentioned in this podcast:

To receive the Inside Out® Wisdom Series, see HERE (or click on the image above)
For Suzi's current list of programs, see HERE.
For Suzi's mailing list, see the footer of this page (black section) for a general sign up to the mailing list form.

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Transcript of Episode 7 of the Inside Out Entrepreneur® Podcast

[00:00:00]You're listening to the Inside Out Entrepreneur Podcast. Today, I am sharing one of the ways that I unstick myself or I unstick my clients when they're going through more difficult periods in their life or business. This is one that might radically change how you think about obstacles in your life and business.
[00:00:18] All right, buckle up, enjoy the ride, this is your time now. Okay, let's go. 
[00:00:24] Hi, I'm Suzi Belmont, a multiple seven figure entrepreneur with 15 years experience building and selling businesses, as well as being a psychology expert, qualified coach, and therapist. Think of this show as personal development for women like you who want to master your inner world in order to lead yourself to greater external success, whether that's in relationships, emotionally, in business, or financially.
[00:00:52] So, pull up your chair and get ready to change your life and your business from the inside out. This is the Inside Out Entrepreneur Podcast. 
[00:01:03] Hello everyone and welcome back to the podcast with me, your host, Suzi Belmont. And this week I want to talk about how you get through things in life and business when your energy drops. And you can hear yourself quietly whispering, I can't do this anymore.
[00:01:19] Or perhaps you more loudly think, possibly on a bit of a repeat cycle, I just wish I knew how this was all going to turn out. But in doing so, in having those thoughts, you kind of stop yourself moving forward because you aren't certain how it will actually turn out. So you get stuck. And then inevitably you start to grind to a little bit of a halt.
[00:01:39] Or your motivation goes a bit wonky because you aren't sure if you are doing things the way that's going to pay off and work out well for you, emotionally, financially, or in any other way. And this kind of starts to dictate your thoughts a little bit and it becomes an obstacle. It stops you always moving forward the way that you want to do.
[00:01:57] You see, there are times in life and in business [00:02:00] and on this whole emotional roller coaster of entrepreneurship. Where it can start to feel like you're teetering on the edge of a cliff labelled The Plunge to Defeatedness. And it takes all of your energy not to fall off the edge of that cliff and go hurtling down the mountain into a kind of valley of despair and feeling defeated by what you're doing.
[00:02:20] And you're still there, right now, you're still there at the top of the cliff. Or maybe you've kind of slipped down a little bit as the rock at the top is a little bit unstable. And you might have just lost your footing a little bit and now you're kind of hanging on thinking, how do I do this? How am I going to carry on?
[00:02:38] How do I know that I won't fall if I take a step? So you stop yourself taking the step just in case you fall. This is kind of the area that I'm exploring and talking about today. And usually there's something inside of you, a bit of an inner strength that comes along and helps you, but sometimes it takes a little while for that inner strength to kickstart.
[00:02:59] You just need a little bit of a booster to get it reignited. And it's how you think about all of this re ignition stage that I'm going to talk about this week. Because the problem isn't the feeling defeated sometimes, that happens to all of us. And the solution isn't just to always push through and be really smiley and cheery about it, that's just kind of fake toxic positivity.
[00:03:19] The crux is understanding this re ignition point, this stage of just being able to restart yourself. It's like having a little bit of jump leads that just restart you and then you're like, OK, I've got it now, I can ride by myself. And really digging deep on that, that's where I want to go today. Before I do, however, I want to share the review of the week, which is something that I used to do, and I've forgotten that I used to do this.
[00:03:42] But I'm going to start this practice again as long as I get reviews. So this week it comes from Mary T from the UK on Apple Podcasts. And Mary wrote as a review, brilliant, with a little celebration emoji face. I listened to the backstory episode today on my train journey and thoroughly enjoyed it. [00:04:00] A very impressive podcast episodes and one of the best podcasts I have heard.
[00:04:04] And Mary goes on to add, given I'd met Suzi at a business event last year, it was lovely to hear her backstory and I was moved by it. What an incredible woman, very inspiring. Now, that's actually quite hard for me to read because I'm not back in the zone of this. I used to kind of feel quite comfortable reading these, but it's a little bit awkward when you're reading that about yourself, but I'm going to do it because I think it's really important to share and I think it's really important that we do celebrate each other.
[00:04:30] We lift each other up and we can give that to other people and we can also receive it. So this is me receiving it and Thanking you so very much, Mary, for taking the time to post a review. It is so powerful for me to receive these. So if you are a listener right now and you've not posted a review and you're minded to because you're liking the show, please do so because it means the world to me.
[00:04:50] Okay, back on to this week's episode and the topic of how you think about all of this re ignition stage that I mentioned before. And let me start off by sharing a little story with you. So I'm going to take you back to the time when I was on this long sabbatical that I took, and uh, it was a couple of years ago, not long after I came back from five weeks traveling around Bali with my husband, James, and my kids.
[00:05:13] And when I got back from that trip, I started to get some signs of ill health. I had fatigue and pain in my arms that was so bad that I ended up being blue lighted in an ambulance to hospital. And I should add, just for the purposes of this story, that this all happened on my husband's birthday, which was not exactly ideal, spending your birthday watching your wife in kind of complete agony in A& E.
[00:05:33] That's not plan A. But he was very gracious about it, and obviously we got through that. And the reason I mention this is because it tends to always be like that. Don't you find, like, times that throw you off target, the times that stop you in your tracks, that slow you down or cause you just to get really stuck, don't happen conveniently.
[00:05:53] They happen exactly when you don't want them to. It's like the universe knows something that you don't, but more on that in a [00:06:00] little bit. So there I was in hospital and it was during this period of time that I learned something that I want to share with you today about dealing with your inner world when faced with the realities of your outer world.
[00:06:11] Whether that outer world issue is physical pain, emotional pain, mental pain, stuckness, just general sticky stuckness in your business. Relationship worries, financial and money worries, or something else, this applies to anything that you're trying to deal with where you're stuck or you're feeling like you're slipping down and you're a little bit scared to take a step forward.
[00:06:31] This way of thinking about it can help with all of it. So try and picture me lying there on a hospital bed and the pain and the struggle was so hard that I can clearly remember telling my husband James. I don't think I can do this anymore. I just can't do it. This pain is so bad. I just can't do this.
[00:06:49] And I can remember laughing a little bit at the same time as I said to him, honestly, you don't understand. This pain is a million times worse than childbirth because there are no contractions with this pain. I just can't catch my breath. I can't get enough of it. Time enough moments to just be able to start breathing and regulating my breathing because I knew how important that was to getting through the pain.
[00:07:09] It was continuous. It was relentless. I didn't know when it was going to stop. I didn't know when it was going to end. And at that particular moment in time, it just felt like it was never going to end. And at one point I just said to him, I just need to know, I just need to know when it's going to stop.
[00:07:22] Can you find out from the doctor, like, is there any idea how long this might last for? And then I said, I just need to know what's going to happen next. I need to know how long this is going to take. I need to know, I need to know, that's where I was. And I mention this because of this phrase, I need to know.
[00:07:37] If you've ever had that situation or that thought where you think, I need to know, I need to know exactly what will happen next. This is something I want you to think about when you're dealing with being stuck in life and in business. Now, whilst this can also apply to physical pain, the episode today isn't going to go on and talk about physical pain specifically, but about managing all kinds of situations in your life when you [00:08:00] feel stuck or when you think, I don't know if I can do this anymore.
[00:08:04] You see, when you think from a place of, I need to know what's gonna happen, or I need to know exactly what's gonna happen in the future, I need to know exactly the timeline where I won't be stuck anymore, or if I take this step, I need to know that everything will work out and nothing will go wrong. I need that certainty.
[00:08:22] And if you're thinking things like, I need to know that if I show up and I do all of the things in my business, I will have the life and the money that I want to have. And if you're doing all of this all of the time. It's like you're looking for something, for some kind of indication, some kind of sign that will help you get unstuck and help you move on so that you can feel that you can do it.
[00:08:42] And what I want to share and what I learned from that time in hospital is that you are the sign. You are exactly what you are looking for. And you need to stop looking outside of you for a sign, and start leaning in and turning into your inner world. So, let me explain in more detail what I mean there, because that's kind of not that easy to grasp as a concept, and it sounds a little bit woo woo at this point, so just bear with me and listen to what I'm going to say next.
[00:09:09] Go back to when you were just born. Think about you as a young baby. You didn't know anything about life at that point. You didn't know how to eat, you didn't know how to drink, you didn't know how to move. You could do some basic things like breathing and screaming and clutching things with your hands and sucking.
[00:09:25] That was pretty much it. So you would just cry or scream and flail your arms everywhere, hoping that it would kind of work out. And you would just go with it. You would eat whatever was shoved in your mouth by sucking on it and going, Okay, this will do. This kind of seems like the right direction and there are people around you when you're a young baby who are making sure that you are okay.
[00:09:45] So you just get on with it. Now, you didn't know at that time exactly what was going to happen, but you just trusted it would work out, mostly because you didn't have any other options at that point. That part of your brain, your executive functioning part, [00:10:00] that questioned whether there was a better option, was not online at that point.
[00:10:04] So you just kind of had to wait. To go with whatever happened next. No questions asked. You just got on with it and it kind of worked out and you got bigger and you got fatter as a baby and you started to develop and all was good. Then a few months or a few years later, depending on your timeline, you entered into another stuck stage where you were in a place of thinking, all right, okay.
[00:10:24] I'm progressing through life. I need to do this walking thing now. This is where I'm at. I want to walk across the room. I don't want to crawl anymore. And so you started. You tried it and you learnt it. You didn't say, I need to know. I need to know right this minute, age one and a half, am I going to be so good at this walking thing that I'm actually going to turn out to be an Olympic level walker?
[00:10:44] Or am I going to be a bit crap and hobble along with a bit of a waddle when I'm grown up? You didn't think that. You didn't say, I'm not going to do this walking thing. I'm not going to be so good at it. So I'm just not going to try. I'm stuck. So I don't know how it's going to work out. So I'm not even going to try and move forward.
[00:10:59] I'm not going to take any steps. You didn't say, I'm not going to move. I'm not going to move at all. I'm just going to stay here, sat on the floor. I know 70 years. That's what I'll do. Cause then I know that I'll be safe on this floor. You didn't do that. You just went, okay, let me have a go. Let me have a go at this walking thing.
[00:11:17] Then you stood up, and you fell over, and you went, uh, okay, this isn't that easy, I keep falling down. But you got up again, and you tried again, and then you fell, and you hurt yourself, and you hurt your little butt, but you got back up again. Or maybe you had a little cry, and then you got back up again.
[00:11:32] Maybe you got someone, you reached your arms up, and you got your mom or your dad or somebody else to hug you, and then you're like, okay, I feel a little bit better now. And then you started to run a bit, and you fell, and you probably grazed your knee for the first time, or your face, or like one of my children, my eldest son did, the first time he ran, he fell on his nose, I don't even know how he did this, he kind of, this is a bit gross, so, he kind of sliced off the top layer of his nose skin, from like his eyebrows down to his nose, and it took like six months to heal, it was really bad, so he [00:12:00] properly damaged himself, but he didn't turn around and say no, no, no, not doing that again, He just forgot about it.
[00:12:05] He thought, okay, you know, mistakes happen. I'll get up. I'll carry on. I'm not going to give up this whole running thing. He didn't say, gosh, that hurts so much. I'm never going to do this walking or running thing ever again. So going back to you coming away from his story for a moment, going back to you, you probably got frustrated as a two year old.
[00:12:22] You probably well, we know you did, because all two year olds typically get frustrated. So you got frustrated. You probably got mad. But then you got better again. You moved forward again. You didn't know what was going to happen at all, but you were still able to move on. You still kept going. And then the same thing happened at school.
[00:12:40] You didn't know if you studied and did your exams, whether you would get a job or not. You didn't know what career you would have for sure. You didn't know that it would work out or whether you would work for yourself or do the business you're doing now or work for someone else. In fact, think about that.
[00:12:55] Are you doing right now exactly what you thought you would do when you were 11 years old? Probably not. If I use my own comparison, age 11, I'm pretty sure I wanted to be an astronaut. Back when I was 13, I think at one point I wanted to be a trumpet player and I wanted to be an artist and all sorts of different things.
[00:13:12] I didn't know. I didn't know if it was going to work out at all. I didn't know what my business was going to be. And actually my career has changed a lot of times throughout my adult life. The point I'm trying to make is when you were a young child, when you were a teenager, you still kept going. You showed up.
[00:13:27] You just had some hope that you were going in the right direction, so you carried on. Then maybe you got your first job or you started a business and most probably you got loads of things wrong. I mean, again, if I use me as an example here, honestly, I got so much wrong at the beginning of my career. Like my first, my very first week in the office when I was a lawyer, I was taken on work drinks with some very, very senior partners.
[00:13:49] And I was so, so ridiculously clueless as a 23 year old living in London that I ended up really drunk and then losing my wallet and having to borrow money from these very senior [00:14:00] partners just to get home that night. Then the next day I had to walk into their office with my kind of head. Bowed down with a slight hangover to return the borrowed money thinking, Oh my gosh, this is so embarrassing.
[00:14:12] Like, I can't actually remember whether I said anything really embarrassing last night or not. And there was this kind of weird look between us where I just sort of died a little bit inside and then thought, Okay, this is actually my career. Maybe I need to not do things like that in the office because I was still in that transition from university to a professional field.
[00:14:29] And yet, even despite these really embarrassing and difficult situations, I didn't quit. Most people don't usually quit when something like that happens. Maybe if you're like me, you have the odd impromptu sick day that helps make things a little bit easier to face, but you ultimately have to go back in and move on.
[00:14:47] Not knowing how the following day is going to be, how the following month or the following year will be. And perhaps, also as another example, perhaps you went on dates, but you didn't go on one date thinking, you know what, I'm only going to go out for dinner with this man or this woman if I'm certain it's going to lead to marriage and 2.
[00:15:02] 4 children and a perfect family life. No, you just went. You saw what it was like and if it didn't work out, you moved on and you found a new date. Or maybe they moved on and you were left sobbing for a little bit and then you eventually moved on too. And then the same happened when you were having kids.
[00:15:17] If those of you who've got kids or if you didn't have kids, you just moved on in the same way. Focusing on those of you who did have kids, before you had kids, you probably had no idea how many things you were going to get wrong. You probably thought you were going to be the mum who fed their kids vegetables all the time and never got mad and never got dysregulated.
[00:15:34] And the reality is, Reality is you ended up giving them a Frito Frog chocolate bar one day just because you did, and then you moved on. You didn't give up parenting, you didn't say, that's it, I resign. I'm not doing this mother thing ever again, because it didn't match the ideal path that you were supposed to be on in your head just because you didn't know how to do it.
[00:15:52] You didn't stop and say, that's it. I'm not having any kids. I'm not getting married, I'm not having a job. I'm not building a business because I dunno how to do it. I dunno what will [00:16:00] happen. You just took one step. in the right direction. You see where I'm going here? This is a series of patterns in your life and patterns in your business.
[00:16:09] And that pattern is often about moving forward even when you don't know how it's going to work out, even when you have no clue what you're doing, even when you have no certainty that it's actually going to even work at all. You move forward and then, funnily enough, It often does work out in the way that it was meant to work out for you.
[00:16:29] And if you're thinking, well, for me, it didn't work out very well, that's kind of hard as a statement to really, really digest. Because what if the thing that you thought didn't work out really well didn't work out because there's something better coming along? What if that didn't work, because the thing that you're going to be the most famous for, the most brilliant at, the most known for, is still marinating, is still formulating, and your job is to keep taking the steps, and to not stop and say, I don't know what to do now, I don't think I can carry on anymore, because you've actually thought the thing that you were supposed to be doing has failed, but you haven't seen that actually the real thing that's for you is the thing that's is still a work in progress.
[00:17:09] And this is the crux of today's episode. You see, how you move forward, how anything happens in your life and in your business is affected by your frequency, your energy and your vibration. So sometimes if you are in a very low frequency and your vibration is very low, you move forward from a place of victim mindset, from stress, from frustration, from anger, from lethargy, and that affects your thoughts.
[00:17:35] your actions and your behavior. And other times you move forward from a completely different frequency, from a completely different energy. And that might be from a place of stability or capacity or creation or mastery. And that changes the thoughts and the actions and the behaviors that you're having.
[00:17:52] And consequently, the results are completely different to when you are taking actions from the former place of frustration, anger, [00:18:00] victim mindset, and so on. And let me just put some flesh on the bones there. So let me give you a couple of examples. Let's say you have decided that you are going to build a following of a thousand people on whatever is your favorite social media channel, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, doesn't matter, pick one.
[00:18:15] And you decide that you're going to do that. So you post a few times and you only get 10 followers. Or maybe you get no followers. If you then move into a place, as a result of that stress, of thinking, oh, this is never going to work out. Oh, I'm just so frustrated with this and I can't be bothered to post anymore.
[00:18:30] It takes too much time, takes too much effort, and I never get any results because look, nothing happened in a week or two. That then changes your actions. You're in a victim mindset and that changes your actions. So you start to just say, oh, I can't be bothered. I'm not going to do it. And I'm talking about when this is not a conscious choice.
[00:18:45] You're not saying, you know what, I'm busy with something else. I'm going to come back to posting later. I'm going to give this my all later on when I've got a bit more time. That's a different mindset. I'm talking about when you're just in this victim area going, what's the point? What's the point of even trying?
[00:18:58] It works better for everyone else. It doesn't work for me. That will make sure that your actions don't manifest into anything because you're not going to take the actions. Contrast that to the exact same situation where you're going to build your thousand followers and you post and you get no followers.
[00:19:12] You post for a week and you get no followers. But instead you come at this from a place of curiosity and capacity or mastery. So you say, okay, I'm a bit curious here, this didn't work out, maybe I should change how I'm doing things a little bit, maybe I should redesign what I'm doing with the posts, maybe I should get curious about people who are having success and look at what are they doing and what resonates and then how would that translate into what I'm doing.
[00:19:37] Maybe I should just allow a bit more time for mastery. So you keep going. You keep moving forward. You don't just collapse down from this place of victimhood. You stay in this higher frequency of energy and curiosity and mastery and creation. And you keep going. Can you see how those two different energy levels will completely change your actions?
[00:19:58] Let's look at this another way, [00:20:00] referring back to what I was saying earlier. If you move forward, or you try and move forward thinking, this isn't going to work, I need to know what happens, and it isn't going to work, your brain will look for evidence on the outside to match your thoughts on the inside.
[00:20:13] It literally does that. And so it will actually help you find evidence that it's not going to work. And lo and behold, it then doesn't. And you end up thinking, I knew it, I knew it wouldn't work. You didn't know it. You didn't know it at all. You created that outcome by choice. You moved yourself into a place of low frequency and then you stopped taking the actions because you were in this kind of more victim mindset of, I can't do it and I don't know what's going to happen.
[00:20:40] Then you looked for evidence of other people where it's not happening and you said, Oh, you see, it doesn't work. You did that by choice. You might not have consciously been thinking that you were choosing that, but subconsciously, that was your choice. And there's a lot of other stuff that goes around those subconscious choices, which I'm not going to go into today, that's more for my paid programs.
[00:20:57] But essentially, it was a choice. Now, contrast that, if you move forward from a place of, you know what, it's not working right now, but it will work somehow. I don't need to know right now exactly how it's all going to pan out. You show up differently, and it does work, ultimately. But even then, you might not see that straight away.
[00:21:17] You're not going to see it if you're rigid in how you think it's going to work. Often, how it works isn't in the way that you planned. The how is often a completely different thing than you thought it would be. You've just got to stay focused on the fact that it will at some point. So let me give you another example here.
[00:21:34] And this comes from one of my one to one clients. So this particular client, absolutely beautiful, amazing client. And she set a goal when we were working together a couple of years ago to make 100, 000 a year, 100, 000 pounds a year in her new business. It was a brand new business and that's where she was aiming for.
[00:21:50] And she was determined that it was going to happen within her business. Okay. But at the same time, she'd been telling me how she really loved property development and she was going to use some of the [00:22:00] money that she made to invest in property and do some property development. And how one day she'd actually love to be a property developer, but she didn't really know much about how to do that.
[00:22:09] So she was going to focus on her main business for now, to start bringing in the cash to then almost allow her to have kind of a hobby. Well, wind the clock forward to two years later, and she made exactly 200, 000 in profit. So, 100, 000 a year was her goal, and she'd made 200, 000 in profit. However, where do you think she made that?
[00:22:33] It actually came from property, something that she thought was not her main business. She actually kind of did it on the side, alongside running her main business. She had been really clear about what her goal was, but she hadn't realized that she had actually achieved it through being opened to the possibility of how to achieve it.
[00:22:54] She wasn't closed in the how. She wasn't saying, I'm only going to achieve this through one route, which is through my business. She'd been open to the possibility that it might come in in other areas. You see, it is your frequency, your energetic vibration and your energy that is really what creates your reality.
[00:23:12] Not just your thoughts. And it's maintaining that that is so important for getting beyond a place of I'm stuck and I can't do this anymore. Because it does affect your actions as I'm hopefully explaining. So, in this particular client's case, she made the 200, 000, but it came in from a different area to where she expected it to come from originally.
[00:23:31] And because she hadn't closed that down, because she kept going in all of her different things that she was doing, she didn't block that happening. Now, there's another thing I want to make sure that you are also aware of. As awareness, as I always say, awareness is everything. And that is the process of learning to trust that you were born with what you need.
[00:23:51] You see, despite going through a lot of your life just trusting that it would work out somehow, as I've already explained when I spoke about how you were when you were a little baby and a [00:24:00] toddler and going through school and work and everything else and being a parent if you did that, you kind of just trusted that it would work out if you took the steps.
[00:24:06] But something happens when you become like a fully fledged adult, a fully fledged grown up, and you stop trusting yourself. And this is really true of women, I think. It happened for me about age 35. So about 35 years of age, I just stopped trusting that everything would work out, and I started to get really clamped down on, I need to know, I need to know that it's all going to work out.
[00:24:28] For you, that may have happened at a younger age, or it may not have happened yet. It may come at an older age. And it's when you stop thinking, OK, I'm just going to go forward and I'm going to trust this will all work out. And instead you start to think, OK, now I've got loads of life experience, so I kind of should know better.
[00:24:44] I should know how it works out by now. I should know the ending. I should have the certainty. And then you start to say things like, no, no, I'm not going to let myself move forward with this new thing that I'm doing because I don't have certainty. I won't let myself mess it up. I won't be OK if I don't know that it's going to work out.
[00:25:03] So you stop allowing mistakes to be okay, and then you come to a grinding halt. It's like, if you compare to that little toddler version of you, it's like you stopped allowing yourself to fall over, but then you couldn't learn how to walk. If you are building a business, and particularly for those of you who are in your perimenopausal This is really the case because you're also grappling with anxiety and brain fog and sometimes physical pains and all sorts of other things that can come with the perimenopause, which then compounds these thoughts.
[00:25:34] And sometimes you can start to really beat yourself up about this and speak to yourself in a way that you really wouldn't speak to anyone else. You stop being like that two year old who fell over and saying, Oh, whoops, nevermind. I'll just get back up and do it again with a few grazes and so on. And you start to say, maybe subconsciously or maybe consciously, Oh, no.
[00:25:52] I fell down. I can never get back up again because I don't have that certainty. I need to know exactly what will happen when I get back up. I need to know exactly what the [00:26:00] future will look, would look like. And if you really put this on steroids, you might even start saying things like, I need to know because I'm running out of time.
[00:26:06] I need to know that it's definitely going to work out because I'm running out of time. You're not running out of time, but you will run out of time if you literally stop moving. So you have to make a choice here. And what's happening is because you can't know. Because you can't know the future. Your brain will start to panic and say, alert, alert, she's entering the territory of the unknown.
[00:26:25] This is not safe. We in the brain, the part of the brain that makes her stay safe doesn't like this because she's going into this place of the unknown. And so you start to respond with thoughts like, I can't do it. I can't do this. When you're allowing this, this mental and this emotional process to get hold of you, you might start thinking things like, what if it's never going to be any better?
[00:26:44] What if I never succeed? What if I run out of time, like I said, to make this work? And this is worse. self sabotage kicks in. Perhaps you start comparing yourself to other people and then that dampens your confidence. Or you start to get absolutely paralyzed in a fear of thinking you need that certainty to be able to get unstuck.
[00:27:02] You start to feel that you need certainty that you can do it and you can carry on. But, and this is what I want to challenge you to, what if you stopped doing this? What if you just didn't do this anymore? What if you went back to doing it the way you already knew how to do? The way you were born to do it.
[00:27:20] And this is why I say that you were born with what you need. The way that you just trusted yourself before, when you were a young child or a young adult or a teenager. The way you could move forward by just taking the tiny steps without knowing the future. What if you now, as the adult, as the woman you are now, what if you allowed yourself to take tiny steps?
[00:27:38] Tiny little action steps, and then for every single one, you acknowledged it, and then you were grateful for it. You celebrated it. You celebrated you, just like you were celebrated by somebody else when you were little for when you took those very first steps. Now, you can take it. You can do the celebration.
[00:27:54] It's not your parents clapping you on. It's you. You are your own parent now. You need to do your [00:28:00] own self applause. You need to cheer yourself on and say, I can do this and I don't need to know the future. I can keep going. What if you just always allowed yourself to move forward, even when it was hard?
[00:28:10] Perhaps having thoughts like one day, this thing that I'm doing right now might be part of how I help others. It might not. It doesn't matter. I'm just moving forward. At the time, you don't know with certainty whether it will or not. That will only become clearer much later. And if you want to know how I know that, that's exactly what happened with me.
[00:28:29] Let me remind you where my story started. The beginning of this podcast started. I was in hospital after an ambulance journey there and I was in such pain and I had to get through that somehow. And I had to get beyond my beliefs that I couldn't do it anymore. It was too hard and I need to know what's going to happen.
[00:28:47] And instead of having those thoughts at that time, I flipped them into a new place and I started to think in that hospital bed, every little bit of progress I make matters. Every little second that I can get to try and catch my breath and move forward matters. I started to trust myself and trust that I could regain control of what was going on in my body.
[00:29:09] I started to trust that I didn't need to know when it would stop hurting or whether it would even ever go away. I just needed to trust myself to move on with the very next tiny weenie steps. And they were tiny weenie steps at that point. Just being able to breathe in some kind of motion of going in and out was a step.
[00:29:27] And that's what I focused on. Those little steps rather than thinking, is this going to end? I don't know if I can do this anymore. And then, many, many years later, I'm here sharing this story with you. And I realized that this happened for me for the reasons that I could never have known when I was sat in that bed, in that hospital bed.
[00:29:45] I could never have thought, well, one day you're going to do a podcast and you're going to mention this. That wouldn't have been on my mind at that time. There was no part of me back at that time that knew that this particular story would end up being something that I would share with one of my one to one clients [00:30:00] recently.
[00:30:00] And there was no part of me back then that knew that this would become this podcast episode. There was no certainty in anything except my frequency and my energy at that time and my choice to change it, my choice to trust myself and move back into knowing that it would work out. Because if I just allowed myself to move forward, that would ultimately lead to it working out.
[00:30:23] Now, this doesn't mean that every single thing that happens in your life or your business will be something you need to turn into a coaching moment. Some things will happen that you might never talk about again, but you will only find out what is meant to happen for you on your life journey by moving forward, by trusting that you can get unstuck.
[00:30:41] By allowing whatever is supposed to happen, to happen. By saying, I've got this. I can move forward from a place of not needing to know the end right now. Not needing certainty. Just knowing that there is a possibility that each day that you will move forward, you will take a little step. And this is where I suggest you lean into when you're starting to feel like you can't do it anymore or when you're really, really stuck.
[00:31:05] Instead of going for the bigger end goal, just go for the tiny little step. You've actually done this journey hundreds, if not thousands of times before. You've just forgotten about all of the many, many other times in your life when you didn't know what would happen, but it all worked out. Or you didn't know what would happen and it didn't work out, but you were still able to find a new path.
[00:31:26] And you know that because you're here right now. listening to this episode. Remember all of those previous times. You look back now and you don't remember how hard it was to learn to walk, how frustrating it must have been, how much it hurt your little butt when you fell over. Your brain doesn't remember that, at least consciously, because at the time in your life, at that time in your life, your brain was less developed, and it didn't have the ability to criticize, to overthink, to overanalyze, and to compare to all the other little babies, or give up.
[00:31:54] And that is what you want to try and tap into more as an adult. You see, the [00:32:00] true you, your true self, can actually do this. If you can trust you. If you can move forward without certainty of what will happen. If you can trust you to get back up after you make mistakes and not be paralyzed by that. But the false you, the parts of you that you've been conditioned to live with, they're not so good at this.
[00:32:19] So those parts, The not true parts, the false parts of you will cause you to try and look to stop, to get stuck, to move on. They'll try and sabotage you. Learning to lock into the true you and move forward from that place, being grateful right now for every tiny little bit of progress you're making, can help you get unstuck.
[00:32:37] And this is how I recommend you Unstick yourself. Recognize what you have done before that is proof that you can get unstuck. Recognize what you've put in place already in your life to help you when you're stuck, whether that's the people that you have around you that you can lean on or the things or even just making choices like your choice to listen to this podcast today.
[00:32:57] If you've got to this point in the podcast, this was a choice that you made. This is a resource that you've chosen to listen to as you are already leading yourself with good decisions. It is all you working for you to make it all work. It is all choice. And then allow yourself to receive that support and receive that help from the things that you've put in place.
[00:33:18] Receive that divine guidance knowing that you can't have possibility and certainty at the same time. You can't have, if you think about it, you can't have certainty in your life and at the same time have possibility for something else. They can't coexist together, they're opposites. So if you really want to move forward in your life and in your business, you need to let go of your need for certainty all of the time.
[00:33:40] And open up and embrace possibility. If you do this, you will move out of being stuck. You will move out of a belief that you can't do it anymore. And in doing that, you will change your energy, your frequency and your vibration. And you will change your beliefs, your thoughts, your actions, and consequently your [00:34:00] behaviors.
[00:34:00] And then that will change your results. And if you want proof, think about how you feel now at the end of this podcast compared to how you might have felt at the beginning. Is there a difference in how you understand certainty and possibility? Is there a little part of you right now that feels like you can just relax and trust that you know how to do this because you've done it so many times before?
[00:34:21] You just need to let go of the need for that certainty and lean in to that possibility. Okay, that is it from me this week. I hope that this was a useful podcast for you, and if you did enjoy it, I just ask you to pop on over, like Mary did at the beginning of the show, and give a little five star review over on Apple Podcasts, and a little written review, because they're really good for me to see.
[00:34:45] They come out a great deal. Couple of days after you've posted them or if you're on Spotify, you can just comment in the particular episode. It lets you do that and I get little messages to tell me when people do that or just tag me on socials with an image of you listening to the podcast or an image of the podcast and let me know your feedback that way.
[00:35:01] Just remember to tag me. I'm at Suzi Belmont on Instagram. I am Suzi Belmont on Facebook and. various things around Suzi Belmont on different pages. Oh, and one last thing, if you're finding that boosting your motivation is something that you would find useful on a more regular basis, take a look on my website at something that's called the Inside Out Wisdom Series.
[00:35:21] You can see it in the top menu and the footer menu. You will love that if you liked this episode. But that's something you can go off and explore in your own time over on suzibelmont.com. For now though, see you next time!

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Want to reset your motivation with a kick start. Learn all about how to restart your motivation in Episode 4 of the Inside Out Entrepreneur® Podcast here.

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